Avoiding the Attention Whores and the Dreamkillers

Roger writes: Professor i have recently found your website and i must say you should win the nobel badassery prize. I have a question though.

How can you tell a girl exactly how she is when you are fighting, for instance that she is selfish, tease, a liar without causing so much damage where they go bang your best friend as a way of revenge. And also how to respond to replies like "you dont even know me and it's been so long" or "quit trying to tell me what kind of person I am. You dont know the first thing about what I'm thinking" Let it be stated that I'm 18 and still in the little girl games phase. And i know the dont date until your 25 rule just bang rule, but at my age girls are still "virgins" and "innocent" (yeah right) and aren't up for hit and quits. Please elaborate on this, professor.

Holy shit, Roger...where are your balls? Fer Crissakes, why are you even still talking to this bitch? Who gives a shit what makes her tick? She is a little girl, a budding attention whore, a drama queen, and now that you have hit it, it's time for you quit it.

You are not obligated to stay around to try to figure her out. Who cares how "girls your age" are? There is no law that says you have to date "girls your age." Remember what Your Professor has taught: that all of the propaganda about cougars, jaguars, MILFs and GILFs and TV shows like Cougartown have older women scurrying around trying to see what it's like to be with younger men. One recent story even  talked about the increase in STDs among older women as a result of all this running around and "newfound freedom." This presents an opportunity for you.

Stick to older women until you are old enough to want to have a relationship (if that time ever does come). The older they are, the less likely you will feel obligated to be a, gulp, "boyfriend." Since the idea at your age is to just keep pumping as much manjuice daily as possible, try a 35 year old. Men and women were not created equal. You know how you feel like you are at your sexual peak right now? Women don't hit their sexual peak until their mid-thirties.

The reason your girl gives you all this shit and makes you jump through all these hoops is because having sex just isn't that interesting to her right now. Why waste your time? Get meaningless sex from the women who want it most these days: older women. And never put all of your eggs in one basket. Always have a bullpen of willing females ready to go at a moment's notice. Do you think you can handle that?

Kristian writes: Hey Tom. Three years ago I moved out of the United States to go live in Europe (where I started listening to you online), now I'm back and I'm about to start going to college. Almost EVERYONE I knew back in high school is a LOSER. The chicks are trashy teenage mothers, the guys are drug-selling/unemployed morons with no education. What advice could you give a young guy like myself for a fresh start in college. What type of girls and friends should I keep away from? Because I know that even having the wrong friends can sabotage a guys playerdom. Thanks Tom, you rewired my brain of "treating women with respect." You gave me the ambition to, one day, live the life YOU lead.

All good questions, Kristian.

Keep away from chicks who want to move in or settle down. Sure, bang them, but make sure to use a condom 100% of the time, and then when they start trying to come to your place and leave toothbrushes and earrings around to mark their territory, cut them off entirely and move onto the next victim.

The best advice I can give is to think of women in college as cum dumpsters...human urinals. They are there to satisfy your biological needs, not to help pick out your curtains. The minute they start to think of themselves as more than that, you know what to do.

As far as friends are concerned, remember that seeking new tail is a solitary game. It's not something to do with a group of guys. You have to stay focused with your eyes on the prize. Unlike most of your fellow college students, by now  you are probably old enough to go out and drink legally. Fabulous. Go out on your own and target your prey. Keep your friends separate from your pussy hunting. Don't hang around with guys whose balls are in their girfriends' purses. This shit is contagious, I'm telling you. Your male friends are there to do all the things you might stupidly be tempted to do with women: going to concerts, watching sports, going out to dinner. Any time you feel tempted to do anything with a woman besides drinking, smoking weed and fucking, call your buddies and do it with them.

Finally, any time you feel tempted to begin a serious relationship with a female, remember that most women are dreamkillers who will sabotage your efforts to be successful in school and later, when you pursue your career. If you must get into a relationship, wait until you have graduated and then have achieved your career dream. Nothing but fucking until then.

If you can stick to these basic rules, you'll do just great. Good luck in college, Kristian!